Okay, so I am super excited and I can't contain it- so what better to do than blog???!!!
In a few hours I am headed to get my garments and temple clothes for the first time!
I can't wait for July 26th- it seemed so far away when I scheduled the date to recieve my Endowment, but here it is next weekend. If I could manage to find my camera I'd take some excited pictures for you all- but alas it has disappeared off the face of the planet!
Ahem....and for the record....no I'm not getting married, no I'm not going on a mission... its been a crazy few months but the one resounding thing that has repeated in my mind is that it is time for me to go to the temple. I feel like it is the next step in my spiritual progression. It is kind of scary and daunting to think about where I may be a year from now, but I also know that as my relationship with my Heavenly Father has grown I have had the overcoming urge to need to feel and be closer to Him.
I know that God looks out for all of us, I know that no matter how bad a situation may seem God makes sure it always works out for the best.
I've had what seems like more than my fair share of trials in the last few months, but I am so thankful to a loving God who knows and understands the big picture far better than I. I know that He directs all my paths I know that He loves me and he is making sure that I recieve every blessing that I deserve and have worked for.
My step-dad and I were talking a little while back about a few of my woes and he said..."Brittany, the people who wait the longest for the things they want most in life always end up getting the better part. God saves the best for last. If that weren't true you wouldn't be here in the latter-days." At the time it didn't really sink in, which is probably why I heard it from my Branch President a few weeks later in his office as I was recieving my first temple recommend. I will operate in faith knowing that it has to be true because I do know what I know.
Knowing what I know doesn't stop trials from being difficult, but it definitely makes them more bearable. I am a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father, he has a plan and purpose for me that was defined before I came to this Earth. I am so fortunate to have been born to a home with goodly parents who taught me the Gospel, who made sure that I know who I am. On those days when I feel small it helps so much to know that I am a daughter of God, I am of noble birth because of that. I have a birthright- the same birthright as Abraham, Isaac and Jacob- a birthright that I get to claim through baptism and the making and keeping of sacred covenants in the temple.
Sometimes I am amazed that I have made it this far...but then, when you think about it, I haven't done it alone. I've had the blessing of the Holy Ghost as my guide and loving family and friends to help me bear my burdens. God never intended for any of us to be alone, and even though it may feel like I am alone sometimes, I know that this is the time when God is the nearest to me...I just won't open the door for him because I want to wallow.
My biggest prayer for everyone is that they can remember to open that door, that they can forge and create a relationship with God that is close and loving. He is like a parent, and like any parent/child relationship sometimes its hard to ask for what you want, or sometimes he can't give you what you want because the time isn't right. Make no doubt about it, if you are living the way that He asks you to, he will make sure that you have everything you need when you need it because that is what any loving parent would do- its differentiating between needs and wants that we need to learn, especially in today's society where people feel that they are entitled to things or that they have earned it. I have especially caught myself in the last few months exhibiting that sense of entitlement...allow me to demonstrate using my own example...I do everything that I'm supposed to, I work hard, I live the Gospel, I follow the commandments I deserve to be blessed! How come Jane Doe down the street who doesn't live the way that she should seem to have such a great life? She parties, she drinks, etc..and here I am trying to be perfect every day and the one thing that I want more than anything I can't have.... that my friends is feeling entitled, and I am trying to stop. You aren't good so that you will be blessed. You are good because you want to be, because, believe it or not, its easier. You have to remember that Jane Doe may seem to have a perfect life, but behind closed doors she is dealing with the binding chains that Satan tries to grab us all with-her idea of being free isn't really being free.
Free agency is about making the right choices. As long as we make the right choices, then we are free- truly free, because Satan may try to catch us, but he cannot bind us like he can someone who allows themselves to be caught by temptation. Once he has you, he pulls you further away from your Father in Heaven, and who wants that? I certainly know that I don't...I want to be closer to Him, because the closer you are the less likely you are to stumble and fall. Why are you less likely to fall? Because in being closer to God you have to be closer to our brother, Savior and Redeemer Jesus Christ. He is the one who relays messages to God from us, He is the one who through the Atonement, picks you up, dusts you off and makes sure you can keep going, just like any other good big brother would.
I am so grateful for Gospel truths and doctrines in my life. I am grateful that I know who I am, what I'm doing here, and where I am aiming to go after I die. The temple is just the next step in this long path of life. I am so blessed to know that I don't have to walk that path alone and to know the shape of that path... For straight is the path and narrow that gate that leads to everlasting life and happiness! I bear witness of this. To all those of you who are reading this and think that I'm blowing smoke it is my humble prayer that your hearts will be softened and that somehow my words will plant a seed in your heart. To those of you who are touched by this don't thank me, thank a loving God who is always there for you, loving you,and waiting for you to draw nearer to him.
I am so excited to enter the temple. I am excited for the covenants that I will be able to make there. I am excited to be able to be in the House of God and in His presence. I only pray and hope that I am able to follow my Savior Jesus' example and that I am able to be a beacon to those around me who struggle and search to find these strong, sweet and simple truths in their lives. God is good, Jesus is my Savior and friend and I am an instrument in their hands. I only pray tha I am close enough to the spirit so they may use me as they see fit.